There are two types of people when it comes to strap-on bedroom play – those that adore it, and those who haven’t tried it. If you’re one of the fans of strap-on naughty play, then you’ll probably well acquainted with all the things regarding its use. However, if you’re a newbie looking to spice things up, then this article is the right kind of read for you.
If you’re looking to purchase a strap-on, you should do your research first. Choosing the right item can be an exhausting process, especially for those who are new to the world of sex toys and accessories. This article aims to expand your knowledge regarding strap-ons, whether you’re a beginner or an experienced user of one such item.
What’s a strap on, and why use one?
A strap-on is a wearable dildo secured in a harness, which is worn by one person, and used to penetrate the other. As it can be used by anyone, regardless of their gender and sexual preference, a strap-on is a great addition to your bedroom life.
This makes it one of the most versatile pieces of “equipment” in the world’s most exciting sport. If you thought that strap-ons are only for lesbians, or couples who enjoy pegging, you presumed wrong. They are for everyone, and their use is limited only by your imagination.
Strap-ons can be used for vaginal or anal sex, oral, handjobs, and even masturbation. If you are wondering about using sex lube with a strap on, yes we totally recommend that. We encourage you to Read our Full Guide on the best Lubricants for this kind of kinky shit. Regardless of your gender and sexual preference, there are many reasons why you should consider obtaining a strap-on, ranging from exploring new things to pure fun.
However, there are certain factors you should consider before buying this versatile sex toy, like the types and sizes of the harness and appendage. You should discuss the sizes and shapes you and your partner feel most comfortable with. Start small, and increase the size of the toy until you hit that “Uhm, it feels good” spot.
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Different types of strap-on
Fortunately for the newcomers, there are tons of varying strap-on types on the market, and a great deal of those are beginner-oriented. So, if you’re new to this game, you should opt for an all-in-one package.
It’s a strap-on that comes with a pre-attached dildo, eliminating the confusion you might fall into during shopping. All-in-one strap-ons are universal in size and easy to put on, making them great for beginners. They are great for pegging and same-sex penetration, and on top of that – they’re quite affordable.
However, you can’t change the accompanying dildo for a different size, and the harness might not be as adjustable. Also, more experienced users might feel like having less control.
All-in-one straps are primarily for people with a clitoris. Still, some products feature a hollow dildo, which can comfortably accommodate a penis or a bullet vibrator. These are great for men suffering erectile dysfunction, or for those who’s partner craves a little more penetration.
For those more experienced, the most popular choice is the strap-on kit. Kits usually come with a harness, an O-ring, and a dildo. One of the most notable features of strap-on kits is that the dildo is completely interchangeable, to better suit your needs and taste.
The harnesses are universal in size, completely adjustable, and suitable for all body types. The front is usually padded for comfort, featuring a small vibrator pocket for some additional stimulation for the wearer. They are exceptional at same-sex penetration, and pegging, offering a good deal of control, and comfort. Also, they’re built to last, so they’re quite durable, but also a bit pricey and elaborate to use, especially for beginners.
Lastly, the most interesting of all is the strapless strap-on, and just as the name implies, this one has no straps. It’s designed for females, as it’s inserted by the wearer, offering pleasure for both the wearer and the receiving party. It provides for a harness-free, and hands-free penetration, suitable for pegging and same-sex intercourses.
The great thing about this type of product is that it also stimulates the wearer. However, the person wearing it has to have strong pelvic floor muscles to hold the strap-on during penetration.
Of course, there are certain downsides of strapless strap-ons, like the matter of size. These aren’t a good fit for everyone, especially those with more relaxed PF muscles. Unfortunately, due to health reasons, you can’t try one out before purchasing it, regardless of how much fun that may seem.
A thing or two about the harness
The harness is probably the most vital component of a strap-on, being a key factor to a hands-free penetration. Without a comfortable and properly fitting harness, a strap-on experience can turn out to be quite untasteful. For that matter you should pay special attention to it, so that it fits you right, providing a good amount of comfort and control.
As we said, the harnesses can accommodate most sizes and body types, since they’re completely adjustable. Most straps are either elasticated or adjustable via sliders, suitable for anyone between a size 28-waist, or up to 65-inches around.
Besides being universal in size, harnesses also come in a variety of materials, shapes, and colors. All of these factors should depend on your comfort and the desired look. The better suit different needs, the manufacturers offer different types of straps. You can opt for a G-string harness, a jock type, a corset, or an underwear type. Keep in mind that the strap-on is meant to be an extension of your body, so choosing the model you’re most comfortable with is of the utmost importance.
The best feature these items have to offer is the ability to hold different types of dildos, so you and your partner can enjoy different shapes and sizes. Which brings us to the O-rings…
The O-rings
A range of harness strap-ons will have an O-ring in the center. O-rings are mostly rubber rings (some are metal) that slip over your dildo, and connects it with the harness, holding it in place. They come in different diameters, ranging from 1-inch to 2.5-inches, in case you want to use appendages of various sizes.
You can use any dildo you want, as long as the flared base is wider than the shaft. This ensures that the dildo stays in place, preventing any mishaps during penetration. One more thing to remember is that the diameter of the O-ring should match the width of the toy you’re going to use.
Choosing the right toy
When selecting a correct dildo to match your needs and those of your partner, size, and shape matter. Fortunately, they come in all the different colors, shapes, and sizes. Discuss the right size with your partner, as you probably don’t want anything inadequately small, or overwhelmingly massive.
It all depends on how you want to use it. If you’re having anal-play in mind, go with something smaller. For vaginal penetration, you can go with something more substantial. The point of the entire experience is to be pleasurable for both the wearer and the receiver, so comfort is vital.
A common misconception about dildos is that only people without the male genitalia use them, primarily lesbians or women pegging their male partners. This is not entirely true, as there are dildos that are unisex, which are hollow in the middle and can be worn over a penis.
Hollow dildos are excellent for those seeking new experiences, or those struggling with erectile dysfunction. Keep in mind that these types of toys can be quite rigid, so they don’t provide the same amount of sensation as regular intercourse.
Play this right
Don’t buy your first strap on through online stores, even specialized ones. Got to an actual brick and mortar store and talk to a trained salesperson. They will provide the best possible advice on your very first special purchase.
Take your time when finding the harness that fits you the most. Purchasing an uncomfortable product may put you off strap-on experience. Include your partner in the process, as it can be an incredibly bonding experience.
After purchase, you should break in your harness and get accustomed to it, especially if you bought a leather one. Getting accustomed to the appendage is also essential, especially if you haven’t gotten used to having something dangling from your pelvis. Wear it around the house, while doing dishes, or watching TV. Play with it, stroke it, and masturbate wearing it.
After a while, you’ll gain a sense of control, and become much more comfortable with it. Give yourself some time to get used to it. You can use that time to learn how to properly thrust, using the appendage you’ve never had before.
If you’re not used to thrusting during intercourse, it will require some practice. You’ll have to learn how to use your muscles for thrusting motion; unfortunately, there aren’t any bulletproof methods of achieving this. You can practice by thrusting against a pillow, but nothing can fully reproduce the feeling of being with a partner.
Practicing with your partner can be a great and humorous endeavor, only if you adhere to a few simple rules. Make sure you use enough lubrication, and consider comfortable sex furniture as it will reduce friction to a pleasurable level. We suggest natural, water-based lubricants as they don’t trigger any allergies.
Take it slow, and don’t forget to explore and communicate. If you’re the one wearing the strap-on, let your partner guide you. Don’t skip on the foreplay, and come in too hot. Kiss and caress your partner. Experiment with oral sex, since it can be a significant turn on for some, and play with angles and depth of penetration.
When it comes to positions, it’s always best to stick with the basics, like the missionary, or a doggy style. As you become more experienced and confident with your new toy, you can add more positions to your repertoire.
In case you were wondering
This part of the article is about pegging, and those unfamiliar with the term and the practice. Pegging is when a woman, in a heterosexual relationship, uses a strap-on to penetrate her male partner anally.
This type of gender-switch play can be an exciting, empowering, and transformative experience for a woman. It’s also one of the most vulnerable sex acts, which requires lots of practice, patience, understanding, and confidence.
Conclusion:
The whole strap-on experience, from choosing the right product, through practice, and its use in the bedroom, is an incredibly fun experience. They are one of the most versatile sex toys on the market, and their use can provide a spicy addition to the bedroom play.
We wholeheartedly recommend that you include your partner in the process of choosing and purchasing a strap-on. You can both participate in the breaking-in process, and several types of play as you both become comfortable with the new addition to your sex life. It’s an incredibly intimate and bonding experience.
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